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I and many other bloggers can wax poetic for days about how the best things in life are free. And I believe they are…you know, the love of family and friends, a smile, or simply having time to do nothing.
However, the worst things in life aren’t free. They’re expensive. And more often than not, they’re also unexpected.
Part of the reason I haven’t been blogged in a while is that we’ve had a series of unfortunate events in my little family of three. Nothing life threatening, thankfully, but worrysome and inconvenience to say the least.
It started with my 10-year-old son, who got sick in the beginning of October. Three trips to the pediatrician, 1 round of antibiotics, 1 trip to the lab for blood work, and 2 weeks later, he was feeling better and back at school. His cough, however, lingered. (Ah,the foreshadowing…)
Then, I took my kids for their regular dental checkup, during which the dentist told me that one of my 17-year-old daughter’s molars was crumbling and would require a crown. Which insurance would not cover, since her entire allowable dental insurance coverage for the year got used up when she had her wisdom teeth extracted.
I swallowed the bitter pill and pulled the money for the crown out of my favorite orifice (you know the one). However, when we got to the dentist, the x-ray showed that the nerve looked a little weird, and the dentist wanted us to see an endodontist for a consult to see if a root canal was required.
So we sauntered over to the endodontist, who confirmed that, yes, a root canal was necessary. And we made an appointment for the following week. (More foreshadowing…)
However, 2 days later, my daughter had a toothache, or more accurately, throbbing pain from her temple to the base of her neck. So the root canal happened the next day. That was a Thursday. A very costly day, to the tune of almost $1200. Fortunately, they didn’t require payment in full.
By Sunday, my daughter had a sore throat. By Tuesday, her tonsils were huge and I literally had to pull her up to get her off the couch. So off to the pediatrician we went, who said it wasn’t strep, but told us to come back for blood work to test for mononucleosis on Thursday if she wasn’t feeling better.
By Thursday she was worse not better, so back to the doctor we went, and then lumbered off for blood work, which confirmed that she does have mononucleosis.
Moving along to last Friday night, her tonsils were gigantic. And painful. When I called the doctor, she said to take her to the children’s hospital emergency room, which we did, and although we waited a long time, she was given medication that helped reduced the swelling in the tonsils, and pain meds as well.
Fast forward a week to today…my daughter seems to be improving overall, but now has pain in the area of her spleen – a problem with mono. So back to the pediatrician we went. And since my son’s cough has never quite gone away, and it’s been a solid month, I took him along for the ride.
Well, the doc said that my daughter needs an ultrasound to check out her spleen and my son needed a pertussis test and an antibiotic in case it is whooping cough.
Oh, and did I mention that my car is acting up? I won’t bore you with the details. Suffice it to say there’s a trip to the service bay in my future.
What’s the point of me telling you all of this? The point is that none of this was expected. All of it cost money. And all of it occurred within the period of one month.
We are some of the fortunate ones. We have health insurance. I have a job. (And I have an understanding boss, since I’ve been missing time from work and doing plenty of working from home.) And even with insurance, this past month was rife with unexpected expenses that I was not prepared for.
Which leads me to wonder about all of the lifestyle design bloggers, simplicity seekers, and frugalistas…what happens when they get sick? How do they afford insurance? Do they even have insurance? What happens when your emergency fund just isn’t big enough to cover those surprise expenses?
All of this makes me realize that I’m more tied to my employment than ever, even at a time when I’ve been questioning what full-time work really has to offer, aside from the income and plenty of stress.
So many bloggers write about the fun & fantastic dreamy parts of pursuing or at least thinking about or attempting to follow your heart’s desires to get away from the mundane workaday world. And all of the financial hacks write about saving for a rainy day.
But what about the realities of every day life? I’d like to know where that fits into their world. And how the hell do they pay for it all?
Full disclosure – I’m not being sarcastic or cynical. I’m being very serious. I’d really like to know how they would deal with a month like we’ve had.
A couple of years ago, I bought this messenger bag on super clearance for $3.49 at Target.
Then, as I used to do, promptly put it away in my closet for potential future use. While I no longer buy just to buy, even if the price is killer, I finally put this messenger bag to good use, after adding a couple of my own personal touches.
As you can see, there’s nothing wrong with the messenger bag, but it looks just like every other messenger bag. I tend to like clothing and accessories that have a bit more flair, but with a budget of approximately $0 for accessories, I can’t really afford to spend $80 to $125 for a super cool, unique messenger bag that no one else will have.
Fortunately, I’m a bit crafty & willing to take a risk. After all, if my evil plan didn’t work out, the messenger bag was only $3.49 about 5 years ago, which adjusted for inflation, depreciation, and sitting in my closet collecting dust for 5 years, is equal to $0.
I decided to embellish said messenger bag with ribbon, all of which I already had at home, so yet another free aspect of this project. The idea was to attach ribbon to already existing striped on the bag.
So, I ironed on some fusible web (also free, since I had some at home) on to the ribbons which I had already cut to size…
I did, however, ruin a hand towel, since the fusible web fused to the towel. Duh. But I guess the hand towel is now my official “crafting towel”. Hey, free crafting towel!
The ribbons with the fusible web ironed on…
Then I trimmed the fusible web on each of the individual ribbons & left the raw edges – just cut them at an angle to prevent fraying, but I won’t mind if it frays a little…
And carefully ironed them into place. OK, maybe not quite as carefully as I should have…I did end up scorching a couple of spots on the messenger bag, which made black marks on the bag. Oh well…it’s going to get dirty anyway, right? Plus, the scorch marks aren’t that noticeable.
I also hand sewed a wide ribbon down the center, making those loopy spaces like you see on messenger bags (I don’t know what those are called, or if they even have a name). Finally, the big reveal…
BEFORE…
AFTER…
The inside…
Like it? I sure do! Plenty o’ polka dots, which I’m sure you can tell that I love, from the background in the pics! And no one else will have a messenger bag like this! Unless you decide to make one, too!
Best of all, $0 spent!
I’m showing off this idea at the link party at Funky Junk Interiors.
It’s been a rough couple of weeks.
It all started about 3 weeks ago, when I found out that an acquaintance of mine from California was missing, with her husband being a person of interest in her disappearance. A couple of days later, her husband was arrested for her murder.
Even though we weren’t close friends, it was a tough blow. You see this stuff on TV, but never really expect it to happen to someone you know.
Then my uncle passed away over Labor Day weekend, and I attended his funeral last week.
When I returned to work, I found out that my boss’ neighbor kid had a freak accident, leaving him without sight in one eye and the potential for additional complications.
Then 2 days ago, a 5th grade boy from the school where my sister teaches was hit by a car and killed. Devastating news, even though I didn’t know the boy or his family. Oddly enough, my 5th grade son told me yesterday that his teacher was in the car behind the one that hit the boy, so she got out to help, and hasn’t been at school since. I can certainly understand why…I’m sure that witnessing that was a horrifying experience.
Needless to say, this sequence of events was jarring, to say the least.
I think that sometimes these kinds of losses can put a person into an uncomfortable state of mind. I know I have being feeling terrible about all of it.
These events, especially when they happen so close to one another, even if they are not affecting us or our immediate family directly, can bring us into a state of mind where we see our own frailties and our own mortality, as well as the frailties and mortality of those who are close to us.
But more than that, they can bring us to a point of fear. Fear of the things we can’t control, fear of evil people in the world, fear of the ways that we can’t protect our children. And most of all, fear of losing the people we are closest to in the world.
Sometimes it’s easy to get caught up in that fear. All of the what if’s. What if that happens to someone I love? What if that happens to my child?
All of those feelings are normal human feelings. The key is not getting carried away by them and not letting them take over your life.
But how?
Aside from the obvious of changing the subject in your mind when you begin to obsess about such things, the only way to really not let these events take over your life is to live.
Push aside your fears and live. Find balance in your life and spend time with the people you care about. Don’t put it off another day. Make the plans and enjoy them now. Because we just never know.
Just imagine how meaningful your relationships will be if you give them the time and attention they deserve.
To me, that’s what makes life worth living, and makes me enjoy life. And when you’re busy enjoying life, it’s hard to find the room for fear.
So go…enjoy the ones you love and enjoy life!
Well…not exactly!
Recently, I sold something on eBay for $50 – quite a windfall for eBay! When I went to print the label, I found that all 3 of the color ink cartridges in my printer were empty. Plus, I have the added benefit of having a printer that doesn’t print in black & white when the color ink is out. Don’t ask me about the logic of that. Sounds like a money-making racket to me!
I’m sure you can imagine my irritation…to print my mailing label, I was going to have to spend my entire eBay windfall, and then some!
I actually walked into the local office superstore and contemplated my purchase. $48 for the 3 color cartridges, plus I needed to get a black cartridge for good measure – $27.
ARGH!
I walked out of said office superstore in disgust and decided to take a drive over to Cartridge World.
I’ve never used Cartridge World before, but my mother has, and if it worked for her and her patent lack of knowledge of all things technology, then I figured I should give them a try.
Let’s just say I hit printer cartridge pay dirt!
At Cartridge World, I purchased 3 color cartridges at $6.99 each, plus 1 black & white at $12.99.
Grand total, including sales tax was $36.25. Less than half of what I would have paid at the office superstore.
It’s almost like printing your own money!
Recently, I wrote about how I’ve been debating about whether I should stay in my house or sell it.
Sometimes, it’s about more than just the money.
This is one of those times.
In addition to the fact that this is not a good time to sell in my neck of the woods, there are other reasons that it’s important for me to stay, even though I’m sure that certain financial gurus would say that it’s financial suicide.
The main reason is that my sister lives two doors down from me. As a single mom, it is incredibly important to me to have family close by. My sister has come over in the middle of the night when I’ve had to pick up a kid from a failed sleepover, and she’s there to make sure my son eats a snack if I’m stuck in traffic at dinner time.
The bonus is all about the cousins. My 2 kids have their 3 cousins just steps away from our house, and believe me, they’re thick as thieves.
You just can’t put a price on any of these benefits.
Now obviously, if there was absolutely no way we could afford to stay, we’d have to give up all of those priceless benefits and call it a day.
But if there’s a way to continue to do it, I think it’s worth it. Even if it means we cut corners on other things, pinch pennies like crazy, and maybe aren’t spending the correct percentages on housing.
Sometimes it’s about more than just the money.
I don’t know about you, but lately I’ve been thinking a lot about our house. Obsessing, in fact. I’m guessing that in this economy, many people have been thinking about their homes and the practicality of staying in their homes, as well as the practicality of selling their homes.
In the spirit of getting real, I can tell you that since my husband and I separated, I pay more for my house than the recommended 31% of my income for my house. And I know that’s not a good plan, so I’ve spent the last 6 months attempting to decide whether I should stay or sell.
But the housing market hasn’t exactly been stellar, and the possibility of making enough money on the sale of this house to buy a smaller home has also been getting smaller. In fact, this past weekend I found out that a house in my neighborhood that is larger than mine sold for $50K less than I bought mine for, so the possibility of making any money after realtor fees and closing costs has evaporated.
And the rental market in our school district in our attendance area is not much more affordable.
So for now I’m staying.
Apparently many other Americans are doing the same according to yesterday’s release of July’s existing home sales, which are the lowest in 15 years. Americans are hunkering down and staying put. Given my situation, I can’t say this surprises me. For many of us, it’s the only option, even if it’s not an ideal option.
Next time, I’ll share why it’s about more than just the money for me.
In the spirit of full disclosure, I regret to inform you that there’s more to share about the homemade laundry soap.
While initially it seemed to clean well, I got a report from my teen laundry subject that was disappointing.
On the surface the clothing got clean with the laundry soap, when things began to heat up (ie, when the test subject began to sweat), it seems that the stale smell of old sweat began to emerge. Not good.
So, sadly, I don’t think this laundry soap recipe is powerful enough for “adult” dirty clothes. However, it works just fine on kids clothing, and is gentle enough for baby and toddler use.
Too bad.
For a while now, I’ve been entertaining the idea of making my own laundry soap.
Trent, over at The Simple Dollar, considers making laundry soap a “spending transfer” – in other words, money he’s not spending on store-bought laundry soap can be put towards something that’s more important to him.
Yes, there’s that. Plus, I’m concerned about the mysterious chemicals that are in my store-bought laundry detergent, and how they’ll affect my kids and me, as well as the environment.
But, all of the recipes for homemade laundry soap that I’ve seen are for liquid laundry soap that looks gross, plus requires cooking, and frankly, being a generally lazy person, that’s more effort that I was willing to put into the process.
Enter the July/August 2010 issue of Natural Home magazine, which had a recipe for simple laundry powder.
Finally! A recipe worth trying!
The recipe called for borax, baking soda, and grated castile soap, and makes enough for a family of 4 for 1 year. I decided to make a smaller recipe, just in case it didn’t work out. I also left out the essential oil, because I prefer my products unscented.
So I pared it down to:
4 c baking soda
3 c borax
2 cups grated castile soap
Let the adventure begin!
Here is my assistant, prepped and ready to make soap…
My assistant, grating a bar of castile soap…
The grated soap…
The borax, baking soda, and grated soap mixture…
The outcome…laundry soap!
Next, it was time to give it a try. On real laundry. And let’s be honest…for it to really work, it would have to work on, um, well…smelly laundry. So while I hate to be gross, it’s a necessary evil to be discussed for this topic. I had to perform a pre-laundry sniff test. Yuck.
I found a piece of rather odiferous clothing and tossed it in the washing machine with the rest of a load. I used 1/8 cup of the powder mixture, as the recipe suggested. And then I went about my business until the load was complete.
When the load was finished, again with the sniff test. I found the aforementioned smelly article of clothing and performed another sniff test.
The result? Complete disappointment.
While the piece of clothing smelled somewhat cleaner, there was still a lingering essence of B.O. How sad. My laundry soap experiment was quickly turning into a laundry soap debacle.
But I don’t give up that easily. Plus, what was I going to do with 6 months of powdered laundry soap?
I decided to try one more load. This time, I enlisted a load of teenage laundry. And yes, I took my life into my own hands and performed the sniff test. I’m sure it comes as no surprise that there was, indeed, an article of clothing that required intense cleaning.
Suddenly, I had a brilliant realization!
Our washing machine is one of those ginormous, front-loading, high efficiency bad boys…what if all I needed to do is add more soap?!
I decided to pit teen B.O. (yes, pun intended) against 1/4 cup of the laundry powder, rather than the recommended 1/8 cup.
Metamorphosis! A load of stinky teen laundry was transformed into a fresh smelling pile of clothes that will likely be stuffed unfolded into a drawer. But at least they were clean! A miracle! The laundry soap worked!
What about the cost?
We used half a box of borax at $3.09 for the box, so the actual cost is $1.55.
Two bars of castile soap at $2.99 each, so $5.98 for both.
Four boxes of baking soda at $.85 each, so $3.40 for all 4 boxes.
$1.55 + $5.98 + $3.40 = $10.93
The original recipe was enough soap to last a year for a family of 4. Which we divided in half. So even though we’re only a family of 3, let’s round up, just to play it safe. So enough soap to last 6 months. Except that we’re now using double the amount for our large-load washing machine. Now we have enough soap to last 3 months. So…
$10.93 / 3 = $3.65
Not bad! $3.65 is less expensive than most laundry detergent, even when using a coupon.
Laundry soap success!
How hard can something called the “Gift Wrap Challenge” be? Not very!
I decided to take the lead of the gals over at Homemade Mamas and take the Gift Wrap Challenge. That means not buying and using store-bought gift wrap and getting creative and using other things, like the Sunday comics, kid’s art, or even colorful catalog pages. Just about anything that you find in your recycle bin will work.
In fact, my son received a gift wrapped in the Sunday comics, and it looked so cute, I could have sworn it was wrapping paper made to look like the Sunday comics!
So why not join in the fun and take up the Gift Wrap Challenge?
A pair of earrings I wrapped in a catalog page & topped with a ribbon scrap
Recently, I started on a quest to find 2 glass jars – one to hold cotton balls and the other for Q-tips. Both needed to be small enough to fit in my medicine cabinet.
It would have been typical to run out to the nearest Big Box Store, where I certainly could have found exactly what I needed. However, when I decided I wanted these jars, I also decided that I should start buying used items more often when possible.
It seemed as if it should be easy enough to find some glass jars. I started out looking on Etsy.com. There I found an amazing selection of vintage glassware. I found one that was perfect for the medicine cabinet – with a red cross on it. But by the time I finished debating with myself about the price of the jar ($14), plus the additional cost of shipping ($10), someone else already snagged it.
So the quest continued.
It ended this past weekend when I was puttering around in my kitchen and saw two glass jam jars that I had been saving because of their adorable shapes.
Eureka! I had found them!
I removed the labels by soaking them in water. One was more stubborn, so I spritzed the remaining glue goo with laundry stain remover. (I learned this trick on Dear Genevieve…she said when removing wallpaper to spray it with laundry stain remover, which breaks down the proteins in the glue…I figured it would work on the label glue, and it did!)
I cleaned and dried both, then filled them with cotton balls and Q-tips, and voila!
 A peek into the inner sanctum…
Adorable jars that fit perfectly in the medicine cabinet!
I love the shapes, and especially love the fruity lid.
 Aren’t these cute?
Plus, I am reusing instead of tossing out one thing, just to buy something new. And best of all is the cost – $0!
Now is this one small effort going to save the environment or make me a millionaire? Probably not. But each long journey begins with one small step.
If each of us started to make more and more of these small efforts, eventually the world would become a different, and I suspect, better place.
What small thing will you do today?
I’m taking this idea to a party at Funky Junk Interiors…
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books worth reading Now or Never: Why We Must Act Now to End Climate Change and Create a Sustainable Future
by Tim Flannery
Generation Debt
by Anya Kamenetz
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